Wow this is so hard....

The shock has begun to wear off and the reality is starting to set in. I can feel the weight of the loss sitting squarely on my shoulders and sometimes it's so heavy that I can't move. The house feels empty and painfully quiet. I keep thinking I see Falkor out of the corner of my eye and then reality hits me in the stomach.

I have lost beloved pets before, but Falkor is the first that was taken SO young and with no warning. I am still angry and feel cheated. The time we get with our pets is never long enough but 3.5 years is is like the snap of the fingers. We had so many plans and so many adventures to look forward to. I was so excited to get to go with Falkor to my first Dane National this year.

Thank goodness for Famke. She is such a ray of sunshine and incredibly sweet. She has been wonderful therapy for all of us.

Everyone has been absolutely wonderful and I truly appreciate everyone's kind words and condolences. Dog people get it.

I know it will eventually get easier. But knowing that and actually getting there are two very different things.

We love you Kumar and miss you SO much buddy!!

Falkor 5/19/2008-2/15/2012

I can't even believe that I have to write this post. It is with a heavy heart that I share with our blog friends that we lost our beloved Falkor yesterday. Everything was normal yesterday morning....the dogs happily ate their breakfast, sniffed around the yard for a while, and then snuggled up by the fire together. I came home from dropping my son off at school and as Falkor was walking in the kitchen blood started to pour from his nose and he slowly collapsed to the floor. I was able to get him up but he was very wobbly and weak. I got him into the van and as I drove to the vet Falkor was very quiet in the back. When we arrived at the vet and the staff came out to help me unload him. As we were unloading him the vet couldn't find a heartbeat. They tried CPR but couldn't resuscitate him. The vet found that he had a tumor on his spleen (hemangiosarcoma) that had ruptured and caused him to bleed out. He had no symptoms...we had no warning. :(

To say I am shocked and saddened is a huge understatement. I feel cheated and I am angry about it. The reality is slowly sinking in and I feel lost. The house is way too quite, it feels empty.

I will write a proper tribute for Falkor once I am able to gather myself a bit. There is a huge hole in my heart and it just hurts too much right now.

Hug your dogs tight!!!